I over apologize

My brain works differently from other peoples’. In my personal experience, I’ve learned that people don’t like to be wrong. Most people I’ve encountered don’t respond to anecdotal or opinion based arguments; they respond to facts.  Sometimes it’s not worth it to tell people they are wrong.

When people are wrong, and I do decide to tell them, I often apologize. I’ve found this to be a helpful tool because when I apologize, when I accept fault for inconveniencing people, they often exhibit a positive response. This has become especially helpful in service and management.

I’ve been using the apology as a crutch. I’ve been apologizing for things far too often. It’s a bad habit I’m trying to break.

When I constantly apologize, over apologize, I’ve noticed people begin to think I’ve done something wrong, even when I haven’t.

Since my brain works differently from other peoples’ brains, I’ve been able to learn from and adapt to reactions. It’s become a survival skill. Sometimes my incite is interpreted as arrogance. I want to be clear. I don’t think I’m better or smarter than anyone. I think I grew up in a way that forced me at a young age to learn and adapt to the behavior of others. People have told me I’m unable to put myself in someone else’s shoes. When I think about what I would do in a situation, it’s often different from what other people would do. I’ve been told I don’t have common sense, empathy, compassion, etc. I don’t think that’s true. I believe I have all those things. My brain and my experiences just causes me to act differently than other people would, and it’s hard for others to fathom that my brain works differently than theirs. It was a radical idea for me to wrap my head around when I was diagnosed. I just want people to understand that my difference doesn’t make me inherently bad.


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